


Amateur grown-up shenanigans inside a vehicle.

by Tia_Maria



Category: Villainous (Cartoon)
Genre: +18, +20, +25, +30, +40, Anyway - I tried to do a good job (At least I tried)., But be prepared for possible failures, Can I tell these things here?, Can you believe it?, Car Sex, Don’t do it inside a car, For those people in need of a very long detailed porn, I CAN’T WRITE PORN WITHOUT SOMETHING GOING WRONG, I guess no one cares about the age restriction in AO3, I honestly hope nobody curses ME for this., I just hope you guys enjoy it, It’s mostly porn, It’s my first time doing such a thing, I’m ashamed, M/M, My hands and my brain just: Make the pair suffer! (Because that’s what real life is doing to us all), Or do it, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Porn With Plot (if you squint), Porn with Feelings (Kinda), Proven Experiences, They have a crush on each other but neither can tell, Villains doing the dirty, Witch Curses (?), sex to love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-20
Updated: 2018-12-20
Packaged: 2019-09-23 17:11:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,780
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17084381
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tia_Maria/pseuds/Tia_Maria
Summary: They were literally eating each other's body solely athwart glances throughout the entire convention, not realizing that they both wanted the same thing.Happily, for both of them, it ended in a pretty nice and hot sex experience.





	Amateur grown-up shenanigans inside a vehicle.

 

 

“Stop _squirming_ so much.” The eldritch man, with a back hat, said wearily to the human kneeling over his hips - trying to settle in a comfortable position - into the upholstered bench seat of the car.

 

It was _very_ difficult to take pants off while sitting at a driver's seat, noticed Black Hat. Especially with an aroused grown-up man, almost sitting in his lap and looking at him from above, completely out of breath and whispering at him to _hurry up_ while caressing his nape with a yellow-gloved hand.

 

“Why is it taking _so long_?” Asked him in annoyance, face flushed and lips swollen because of so much wet kissing.

 

“Your _car_ is too small,” Replied, also annoyed that he wasn’t able to pull his pants off easily. “And my fucking zipper _stuck_.”

 

The human with a scarred face and pretty deep blue eyes was analyzing the panorama outside of the car’s window, it was ok for now - no one was going to appear in the parking lot, everyone was watching the presentation of some other villains that decided to join forces to rule Europe and their schemes. Staring back at Black Hat, the ultimate and most powerful eldritch the earth had the displeasure to meet, having difficulties with opening his own trouser for a quick fuck - made Dr. Flug Slys giggle internally. But, outside, he fake sighed in disappointment, knowing it was going to piss the eldritch off.

 

Himself, the best stand-alone scientist the supervillain weaponry market-society has ever had the pleasure of dealing with, _there_ , all worked up and probably _not_ going to get a quick good fuck he was so much desiring.

 

Why did he accept the offer again?

 

Oh... yeah…

 

Because he was crushing on that man since **_forever_ **.

 

The tiny expectancy Black Hat gave off when they shared the first eye contact at the beginning of the convention already made Dr. Flug weak on his knees. The man was a dream of consumption for hundreds of villains all over the planet (and even out!).

 

The scientist wasn’t even sure **_when_ ** they started to make out, or **_how_ ** they end up hot-rubbing their groins together with Flug’s back pressed against his car hood, eating each-other’s face out, and **_when_ ** _exactly_ they decided that doing it inside the human’s automobile was an _awesome_ idea.

 

Because... Car Sex? Will _never_ be a good idea.

 

_Ever._

 

The optimization of the place just frustrates the pair that is willing to do nice and hot love inside it. The elbows, the knees, the hands, and feet, all taking too much space and not letting either of the participants enjoy it fully.

 

Glancing at the aroused groin between that black man’s legs, made Dr. Flug bite his own lips in excitement and frustration.

 

He wanted to bounce on that man’s lap and crave that feeling inside his prostate for **_life_ ** \- And the probability of it not happening was worse than the idea of _Car Sex_. So he decided to take action.

 

Pushing the taloned hands away from the trouser, the scientist leaned over to meet the man’s face with his own, while his own hands were working on the creature’s pants.

 

“Here,” Flug whispered pressing his mouth against the eldritch’s ones mindlessly. “Let me--”

 

The scientist sigh in relief when he finally pulled the zipper all the way out. Grinning while caressing the villain’s hard erection, he looked down and licked his own lips - _Damn_ , he wanted to mouth nicely at that boner. Hide it inside his throat and taste that man's cum like he would a fresh cup of coffee. But they were in a _fucking_ **_car_**.

 

_Aagghhrr!!_

 

The scientist freed that man's erection and caressed up the exposed chest of the supervillain. Dr. Flug pressed his whole body into the older man’s, tightening his own chest and groin against his, trying to call for that powerful creature attention while biting the other’s lips. Black Hat deepened their kiss, caressing his hands up and down the scientist’s warm back from under the social shirt, scratching him in the process. Now, the human’s knees were pressed against the back of the seat the eldritch was sitting, and he could already feel the hard protuberance of the villain press against the middle of his buttocks

 

“-Aah,” Dr. Flug moaned and parted their lips to punch at his glove compartment. Seeing that it opened, he quickly reached for the lube and a condom he kept there for… unexpected… _emergencies_ … “I’ll prepare myself, ju-just k-keep kissing me.” He breathed the words back into the villain’s mouth.

 

He couldn’t stop kissing the guy - his _teeth_ , his **_tongue_ ** . _UGHrrr_

 

How he wanted to _feel_ that muscular organ _inside_ him.

 

Black Hat, more flushed then Flug would expect the man to be in that kind of situation - giving his popularity - nod and started to put the condom.

 

His vision froze on Flug’s hard groin bouncing slightly and wetting his white boxer - over one single thigh - near the creature’s pelvic region.

 

The doctor pulled the bottom of his shirt up to bite into it. Two fingers appeared from under the scientist’s back - fingering and working himself quickly - while his other hand was firmly gripping the back of the seat for support.

 

The eldritch was admiring the view so much he almost did not listen to the human’s muffled plea for him to keep touching him. _Anywhere_.

 

He decided to grant the man's wish. A taloned hand reached the younger’s back, holding the man firmly in place, while his other one was playing nicely with the man’s boner.

 

The view, as you can guess, was _surreal_.

 

In _both_ ends.

 

Dr. Flug, moaning like he was running a fucking _marathon_ , freed the shirt between his teeth and begged the eldritch man to kiss him again - the human’s mouth was filling with so much saliva he felt some of it slide through the edges.

 

Black Hat just kept staring at him in awe and restained admiration.

 

It was such a rare and marvelous adventure that he was going through that night, that he wanted to consume it like one modern art portrait. _Slowly_. However, the doctor did not seem patient, so he raised from the seat and lift the back of his feet to support his body into a crouching position - preying the dark villain’s mouth while still working fastly and nicely his own entrance.

 

Sporadically, the scientist would stop their kiss to pant and moan - every time he reached something pretty interesting inside himself that the eldritch man _couldn’t wait_ to find out.

 

It wasn’t complicated for Black Hat to find someone interested in him, or willing to give him pleasure in exchange of something. But he has been studying Dr. Flug and his reputation for a few years (since he openly came from a simple freelancer in the black market into one of the bests scientists on all villainous society). All his hard work, all those incredible unimaginable blueprints, all that science-madness vibe, and all that _cute scientist facet_ that he always had a weak spot for - He already knew he had a not-so-small _desire_ for that smart human before that same day, when they exchanged a funny glance up and down each other’s body.

 

The eldritch was probably fulfilling one of his wet dreams right at that moment, but he has a reputation to keep - he couldn’t let his emotions show so easily.

 

One thing that a one-night-stand between villains must have (like a freaking unreasonable rule they all made up out of the blue), is that neither could show good or nice _emotions_.

 

Certainly, the first person that created it was just a _prick_ to their partner, but nonetheless the rule remained unbreakable.

 

So, even with Dr. Flug _and_ Black Hat as deep into it as either one could ever be, neither could _show_ their true feelings.

 

It was frustrating, _yes_ , but it added to the mood like _ecstasy_.

 

The scientist bit down hard into the older man’s bottom lip and groaned manly, sending a challenger look that made a shiver run down the eldritch’s backbone.

 

Staring back, accepting the challenge, Black Hat decided it was time to start taking some _action_ again.

 

He reached his taloned hands to the human’s knees, spreading them widely, making the human gasp - he positioned his thick genital slowly, playing with the meat on the younger's entrance. Enticing both. The eldritch, _euphoric_ , pulled the back of the other man's knees up, planning on dropping Dr. Flug’s balance out and making him feel full force into his erection.

 

It would be awesome if it happened the way he planned.

 

Instead, Flug hit his back into the steering wheel and, consequently, the _horn_.

 

They both shouted in surprise when a loud sound filled the almost inaudible parking lot.

 

Dr. Flug, hugging firmly into Black Hat’s face in mid-panic, was breathing as fast as his heart was beating. And it was almost _exploding_ from high velocity.

 

When the human freed the dark man’s head he apologized deeply and blushed, looking at their state. They were both… not… _hard_ anymore.

 

Black Hat sent him a complicated expression. He put both hands into the human’s hips and sighed, frustrated. _He_ should be the one apologizing, but, since Flug did it first, he felt in need of sharing an important information.

 

“It’s my fault.” He tried to assure the human, grimacing. “I'm _cursed_.”

 

The doctor frowned while looking at the supervillain’s face.

 

“What--”

 

“An old witch.” He interrupted. “Couldn't seduce me, so she probably cast some kind of _malediction_ at my sexual life.”

 

The scientist stopped. Then he giggled. And after that, he laughed out loud - well humored.

 

Resting his forehead into the older man’s shoulders, he decided to sit back into a better position over his lap.

 

The eldritch man was caressing the human’s lower back mindlessly, enjoying the warmth coming from the scientist’s body.

 

Dr. Flug couldn’t stop laughing.

 

Was Black Hat for _real_?!

 

When would he _ever_ be convinced that _Black Hat_ \- the all powerful eldritch supervillain - really believed that he was _actually cursed to be a clumsy fucker_?

 

“Where did you _get_ that from?” Asked Flug, still shaking his shoulders because the internal laugh, looking at the dark man’s sad eyes.

 

“I _am_.”

 

“No, you’re _not_ .” The scientist waved a hand around as if trying to actually understand what happened. “It was an _accident_.”

 

Black Hat frowned at the human, sending him a serious face.

 

“Like _every_ fucking **_time_ **?”

 

Then, Flug arched an eyebrow, surprised.

 

“Do you really _mean it?_ ”

 

A taloned hand was over Black Hat’s face pinching the middle of his eyebrows and sighing in frustration once more.

 

“Why would I kid?” He asked. “ _Now?_ ” He gesticulated between them both.

 

Dr. Flug bit his own bottom lip, curious, trying to hold the laugh in.

 

“Okay, I'm curious.” He said, looking at the eldritch hugging loosely at his waist. “ _When_ did it happen?”

 

Black Hat sighed again, resting his forehead into the younger man.

 

“It was about…” He stopped, thinking on the time. “... a few hundred years ago. It doesn't _matter_!”

 

Flug nod.

 

“It _does_.”

 

Black Hat frowned confused.

 

“ _Why_?”

 

Flug biting his own lips again, approached the powerful villain's body, pressing their chests together and whispering at the general direction of the black man's ears in a hot _hot_ way.

 

“Because it _excites_ me.”

 

The creature widened his eyes in _astonishment_.

 

_What--_

 

....

 

That’s certainly a _first_.

 

“...It doesn't make a _single_ sense.”

 

Dr. Flug laughed again, kissing the man in the lips.

 

“ _You_ don't make a single sense.” The scientist whispered. “But, for some reason, _you_ entice me a lot, so why don't we…” Sounded mischievously, pressing their groins together, Flug initiated a deep kiss once more, holding the creature's face fondly.

 

Black Hat's eyes shined listen to it, but his mouth was too occupied to answer back. His arms hugged the middle of the doctor while he engaged back into the sin, finally feeling secure enough to give the man all he was willing to.

 

His first move was pick up the human's hips, and pull up, getting free access to slide over the driver's seat to position himself better for that activity - under Flug's pretty nice bare ass.

 

Black Hat caressed the man's butt tenderly while stroking himself a bit. He playfully stuffed a taloned finger inside there feeling the still dripping lube moistened hole, and stroked himself harder.

 

The scientist was moaning the supervillain's name into his forehead, kissing the pitch skin, _lovestrucked_.

 

“ _Get in_.” The human whispered into the general direction of Black Hat's ears, licking the dark skin he found there.

 

The eldritch did as asked, pulling the younger's hips into his lap slowly, feeling and seeing the warmth of Flug's body devour his length. The creature gasped, overwhelmed with the sudden pleasure, and clenched both hands into the other man's waist - marking him in the process.

 

The doctor's shaking body and long moaning breaths were telling Black Hat that he was really enjoying it, but he probably needed time to adjust properly around the man's well-endowed erection.

 

It's shape - _gosh_ . Flug could get addicted to it _easily_.

 

The eldritch flushed a little, happier than he thought he would be by finally knowing the feeling of that smart man insides around his penis.

 

Damn… His crush just got worse.

 

Taking deep breaths to restain his strong will of impaling the human until apex reached them both - the black man pulled the younger's shirt up, exposing his chest. Exposing that marvelous freckled cream white skin, that strongly smelled like his new found favorite cologne, Black Hat saw two pinky and flashy nipples and fell in love _immediately_. Licking and playing with them between shaking breaths and millimeter movements from his belly down.

 

Flug was moaning his name, caressing his nape and shoulders, thighs firmly spread and back arched in a way to give all the best access to the older man.

 

Black Hat was licking the human's nipples like candy, purring into his chest. His hips waved up and down, getting out and entering again, even _deeper_ , into the man's body - hearing his broken moan.

 

He did it again, _slowly_ . _Oh so slowly_.

 

And a few more times after that, until the scientist was panting heavily and looking him back in the eye, nodding. His face, flushed a pretty red shade, was making the dark creature's nonexistent heart beat faster.

 

When he decided to finally, **_finally_ ** grip the human's hips and pound him like he so much wanted to - he noticed something very _important_ and _relevant_ for his life.

 

Flug's moans had become Black Hat's favorite sound.

 

With both hands gripping firmly into the older man's shoulders, the scientist closed his eyes enjoying the sensation of being fucked by someone with so high standards he only could dream of. Black Hat threw the man's legs off the driver's seat, to push them up and spread them wider. He saw the human gasp when the eldritch's dick got even deeper inside him because of the new angle. The supervillain was holding the scientist’s back and thighs in place, settling himself into a better position - feet firmly on the ground of the car - to do it.

 

To fuck that man into _oblivion_ and **_beyond_ **.

 

The creature's erection was sliding out and back in, with firm movements, _fast_ , ripping instinctive moans out of the human's lips. He did it again, his thick genital sliding on and off that wet hole, and once more after that.

 

Then, he _repeated_.

 

Dr. Flug was moaning his name loudly, and higher his voice became every time Black Hat decided to pound and trust _faster_ or **harder** or **_both combined_**.

 

The human's tearful eyes staring him down in such luxurious way, only added to the sex.

 

Dr. Flug's right hand was caressing the older man's face, kissing his cheeks and temple while unstoppable moans were leaving his lips by every penetration - Black Hat was doing _such_ a **_good job_ **.

 

Flug's desire on the man only grew. But his sanity was decreasing _by the second_.

 

Black Hat knew something was missing, but he couldn't recall _what_. Then, completely absorbed by the pleasure, he decided to touch the man's groin - knowing how much he'd enjoy it.

 

They could _come together_ . That would be so _wonderful_.

 

The moment he moved his fist to work the human’s boner, Flug gasped and bowed his back so he could wet kiss that eldritch’s mouth in reply - lick his thin lips and bite into it to never forget it’s texture. To **_scar_ ** his mind with the information that was all _that_ : many mixed feelings, intense and pleasurable, happening upon and all over his formerly lonely body.

 

His work takes too much of his time. He’s always too busy to be worried about sex and such fruitless things in his daily life - but, damn… he should _rethink it_.

 

When Black Hat started to work at the man’s erection _harder_ and _faster_ as he pounded the doctor’s ass skillfully, giving his _shivers of ecstasy_ \--

 

Flug’s leg got _numb_.

 

Like some unlucky fate bound to happen when you are doing contortionism in a limited space.

 

He moaned in pleasure when the taloned hand worked him nicely, while the eldritch man was sportly slamming his lap up into the human’s entrance, rhythmically - like the younger man’s moans were the violins to their orchestra. But, as Flug was shouting uncomplete words of strong delight, he pondered about the need to release the absurd numbness sensation on his left leg. It was a _very_ complicated situation for the scientist, given his ultimate wants on not letting the eldritch man stop _one single second_.

 

Black Hat was almost at his limit, but he wanted to make the human reach his orgasm first. He pressed the man’s thighs even more firmly against the doctor’s chest, and linked his own hands into the younger’s back, supporting almost every weight of his body into his strong arms - then, he prepared himself again, feet pinned on the ground to pound into the man’s entrance like his night depended on it.

 

However, Flug’s legs started to pain a little bit _too much_.

 

“Sh-s _stop_ .” The scientist said, _reluctantly_ , swallowing the overrun saliva that was almost leaking out of his mouth.

 

“What?!” Black Hat got really confused and frustrated - he wasn’t mentally prepared for _that_.

 

But he did it, he stopped.

 

Very much _unwilling_ , though.

 

“ _Why?_ ” He asked, in clear annoyance.

 

“M-my leg, ah- _auch_.” Flug answered.

 

The eldritch dropped the body into his lap again, his erection slipped out of that nice warm entrance, and the doctor felt the numbness pain crawl up his leg because of it. “S-sorry,-- _damn_ ! I’m _so sorry_.”

 

Really.

 

He _was_.

 

“J-just a second.” Flug assured the man, lowering his leg back into a good enough position. “This fucking _space_!” The scientist groaned in frustration, hitting the inside of his own car with a fist.

 

Black Hat, still hugging Flug near his body so he wouldn’t hit back the horn, looked over the inside of it analysing the state of the car.

 

The windows were a little dimmish because of some blurry fog their sex created inside the vehicle. The temperature was really hot, like their bodies and breaths. In the backseat were some boxes filled with robot parts and some over weapons the scientist had to bring - and if it was in the back seat, the trunk of the car was probably already full.

 

It was obvious that they would use the backseat if it was available.

 

They were _no beginners_.

 

For crying out loud, they were older than the proper age to actually engage in such unusual activities.

 

Black Hat thought all that, reprimanding himself on not inviting the doctor to a more comfortable place, like a hotel or _the mansion_.

 

And preferably not letting him _leave_ , ever again.

 

The idea worked him up once more.

 

Thankfully, they were both still excited this time.

 

When the idea of inviting the man over to meet his personal quarters got really appetizing - Black Hat decided to ask, as if it wasn’t too much of a deal, whether the doctor wanted to move that sinful acts to a more appropriate place, as in his bed or _the underground chambers_ where _no one_ could really hear him _scream_.

 

“Would you want to--”

 

“Of course I want to!” Flug responded angrily, interrupting the man - probably deducing the question was about their discontinued intercourse and if the doctor wanted to try again.

 

Black Hat blinked slowly, trying to decipher the context of the answer.

 

“Look, just--” The human reached the lever of the driver’s seat and pulled it up, making Black Hat lie in almost 180º, tophat hitting the backseat. Before the supervillain could say anything, Flug crawled up the eldritch’s body to reach their faces once again, devouring the supervillain’s lips hungrily.

 

Damn, he really loved that creature’s dark lips.

 

Dr. Flug positioned over the older man’s hips, spreading his legs wider. He moved a hand into his back to take and to position the eldritch’s boner once more right under his entrance, the meaty tip of the organ, already touching and half sliding inside it.

 

The dark eldritch panted a bit, _yes_ \- he _likes_ that position.

 

“Let me work for now.” The younger man said, heavy breathing a little.

 

Black Hat only nod his head, letting the mad scientist orchestrate his marvelous new version of vivaldi four-seasons, solely with moans and skin contacts.

 

The only thing keeping him from abducting that smart grown-up man and demanding him to sign his soul and body over to him for eternity, was lost the moment they reached orgasm together with his name leaving the human’s broken voice and shaken lips.

 

-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-

 

Neither really wanted to remember what happened _after_ that. Since another unfortunate event took place not even a minute later - involving Black Hat’s orgasm and it’s apparent weird passive consequence of opening a few supernatural portals, unexpectedly, for a short period of time, as he recovers from the high.

 

Dr. Flug got used to admiring the portals at some point, mindlessly noting some aspects of it while lying down on the supervillain’s exposed chest - trying to catch his own breath.

 

After that day - _their first night together_ \- Black Hat indeed proposed Flug to work for him.

 

Bypassing all the drama that took over a few months of insecurities and “you are like every other villain, you just want my weapons! I hate you!”s. They both had their own ways of confessing, and, in the end, everything worked just _fine_.

 

Today, BHO is the best Organization on selling goods and servicing the villains around the world.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm seriously ashamed…  
> Well, as I said before, It’s pretty much just Car Sex.  
> But I’m also extremely glad that you have read it. Thanks! *thumbs up*


End file.
